Everything you need to know

**Dear Joe,

Work can be pretty hard sometimes. This week, I only slept about 10 hours, and the effects are hitting me pretty hard. When I was at the library studying for one of my tests, I fell asleep. Is it alright to sleep in a library, or should I snooze in the privacy of my own home?

—Drowsy in Donner

Dear Drowsy,**

At the risk of sounding like an elementary school teacher: Shame on you! Your behavior is inexcusable. I’m not talking about the library, either. I’m talking about your disregard for your own health. I refuse to believe that extreme sleep deprivation is necessary for good grades. Contrary to popular belief, people don’t think you’re a hard worker when you tell them about your sleep habits. Do yourself a favor and get to bed.

About your question of library sleep, it really is a matter of opinion. Sure, snoring away in Maggie Murph Café is probably a no-no, but I can see many legitimate places to take a nap in Hunt Library. Take the basement, for instance. There are tons of nooks and crannies that are appropriate for rest. And the entirety of the Engineering and Science Library is fair grounds. People will understand when you take a 30-minute break from quantum field theory.

If you end up deciding to sleep in the library, just don’t make it a habit. When you start carrying blankets and a bedtime story to the quiet study area, you may just have a problem.

**Snore away, Joe

Dear Joe,

I’ve got a serious problem. It doesn’t involve drugs, but it probably takes up more time than them. I’m addicted to the Internet. I spend at least six hours a day e-mailing people, writing in my blog, and checking profiles on Facebook. It’s sucking away all of my time, and I’d like to know how to quit. Please help.

—Logged in at Mudge

Dear Logged in,**

I hope you’re not reading this response in the online edition of The Tartan. What you have is a very serious problem. Like most addictions, there are two ways to quit. Either go cold turkey, or slowly decrease your use. With the flood of important e-mail you’re probably getting every day, the first option won’t work too well. Instead, you need some method to make using the Internet harder. My suggestion: unplug your computer and hide it.

This might sound like you’re wasting a very expensive product, but trust me, it’ll work like magic. If followed, the only way you can access the Internet would be through computer clusters. If that doesn’t sound appealing, then I hope you get my point. If something is a pain to do, you won’t be tempted to do it. When you finally kick your filthy habit, you’ll find hours upon hours of free time. You can use it training for a marathon, donating your time to the poor, or composing a symphony. More realistically, you’ll probably spend it watching television. But what the heck, nobody’s perfect.

Just log out, Joe

Need advice? Send queries to advice@thetartan.org.