Pillbox

Foodie top fives

Top five foods you wish were real

1. Butterbeer — J. K. Rowling’s drink of choice in the Harry Potter series is rarely described, but that doesn’t stop her from mentioning that it’s all her beloved characters like to drink. Intrigued, fans of Rowling’s work have theorized a multitude of online recipes, from a hot-chocolate-like drink to regular beer with added butter. Of these, the best idea is cream soda mixed with butterscotch schnapps.

2. Ned’s pies on Pushing Daisies —The colors on Pushing Daises are delightfully over-the-top and vibrant, and the pies made at fictional hangout The Pie Hole are no exception. They practically glow, and they look delicious. Just don’t eat it while thinking about how the fruit is dead.

3. The Flaming Moe — So what if the secret ingredient in this Simpsons concoction is children’s cough syrup? All that matters is that this needs to be set on fire to be served — hence the name.

4. Krabby Patty ­— It sounds disgusting, but SpongeBob SquarePants characters Mr. Krabs and SpongeBob continue to insist that it is practically divine. Even the old grump Squidward likes this burger with a super-secret recipe, and it certainly sounds better than anything Plankton’s got going on at the Chum Bucket.

5. Bachelor Chow — In episodes of the recently resurrected show Futurama, the food advertisements often boast, “Now with flavor!” — which makes products seem less than appealing. But for that situation where you don’t want to eat so much as stay alive, Bachelor Chow seems to fill a niche.

Top five foods to make to put off finals

1. Cake — Who doesn’t want to have a cake? It’s like your birthday but without the presents. Cake is not as good as a present, but it still tastes delicious.

2. Butterbeer — You have to admit, the cream soda and butterscotch schnapps sounded good. Just don’t get totally smashed before you study. And be 21.

3. Pasta — It’s hard enough to get good Italian food on this campus — you might as well try and perfect the dish instead of hitting the books.

4. Homemade Oreo cookies — Possibly the most time-consuming and delicious procrastinator tool ever created. Find the recipe online at www.smittenkitchen.com, but don’t go crazy on the white filling — it’s much sweeter than its cookie counterpart and harder to take in large quantities.

5. Candy cocktail — Throw all of your random favorite snacks into a bowl and mix it together — ta-da! It’s like trail mix, but you don’t have to pick out the parts you don’t like.

Top five cinematic food scenes

1. The Lady and the Tramp — The spaghetti-eating scene is one of the most iconic Disney scenes around.

2. Forrest Gump — The title character’s famous line, “Life is like a box of chocolates,” changed chocolate forever. Chocolate before: the go-to present for husbands looking to buy something for anniversaries, birthdays, and Valentine’s Day. Chocolate after: a metaphor for life itself. You can’t really say anything has done more for chocolate than Forrest Gump.

3. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory — It’s good to know that snotty kids get their comeuppance. In the film, the obnoxious Violet annoys even the charming candymaker played by Gene Wilder and later by Johnny Depp, and when she steals his new prototype gum that tastes like a multi-course dinner, no one is the least bit upset when she turns into a giant blueberry.

4. North by Northwest — In this Hitchcock film, Cary Grant and Eva Marie Saint share a meal on a small train car and begin to fall in love. After that, they get chased around by secret agents for the rest of the movie, before climbing down Mt. Rushmore to escape the bad guys. But in North by Northwest, it all starts with having something to drink and ordering some food while staring into each other’s eyes.

5. Waitress — In Waitress, Keri Russell brings a pie for her elderly doctor when she finds out she’s pregnant, only to find that her doctor has been replaced by a younger and sexier substitute. As the movie progresses, she brings the young doctor more and more pies, and he returns the favor.